What are you gonna DO with yourself?

Now that my youngest is in Kindergarten, I get asked “What are you going to do with yourself all day?”

And I want to reply, “Oh, I think I’ll sit in a corner and cut myself until it’s time to pick up my little darlings. I miss them so.”

 

As if I couldn’t possibly do something of worth while they are slaving away, learning their periodic tables and the finer points of social manipulations?

AS IF I’M A GIANT ASSHOLE FOR JUMPING UP AND DOWN, CLAPPING MY HANDS LIKE A DRUNK CHIMP WITH TOURETTES BECAUSE I’M FREEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

 

Ahem. I’m not that kind of mommy.

Yes, I love my babies. I’m blessed beyond measure, and wouldn’t trade them for the world.

Now, get the frap out and get a job.

Are you friggin serious? What am I gonna do??? Nothing! Everything! I’m gonna paint myself in Sunkist orange soda, don my best flip-flops and climb Mt. Kilimanjaro!  I shall belt on my husband’s taser and go goat hunting! Who cares!

The delight lies not within what I might do, but that I can!  For the first time in 8 years, 5 months and 13 days, I am my own entity.

Woe to the child or husband who interferes with that.

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6 thoughts on “What are you gonna DO with yourself?

  1. Yeah You!

    I think people ask that because they don’t like their jobs and are jealous. They can no longer point at you with your kids in tow and say well at least I’m not her. They want the same freedom you have.

    You can always tell them you are going to hire a cabana boy to feed you bonbons while you roll in the dough from your author royalties. 🙂

  2. Beth,
    Author royalties! Bahahahahahahahahaha!
    Oh wait–am I supposed to be making money from this? ;}
    Thank you, Sonja, Aimee & Beth for stopping by and leaving a comment! 🙂

  3. My hat’s off to you Andris. I couldn’t have stayed home with my kids and kept my sanity. I worked 4 days a week and was a mommy the rest of the week. That’s the best I could do without killing someone. lol! Enjoy your me time. You’ll miss these days when they’re grown.

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